[WEB4LIB] re: of mouse balls and such

[Debra Lords]

I've been criticized by co-workers for suggesting that computers
are whimisical and behave differently for different people.  "You
know," I've been told, "that there is always a logical reason for
things that happen, since computers are made of wires and run on
electric impulses."  I offer this to such individuals asking for
a logical explanation depending on the functionality of the
hardware:

Our Government Documents area had a database which was
particularly "temperamental" in its behavior.  After one update,
the staff of the area repeatedly complained that the database
would not work properly.  I would go and verify their
experience.  I was new in my job and did not know how to
troubleshoot and fix the particular problem I was seeing.  Yet,
everytime my manager came around and tested the database, it
worked perfectly.  He was convinced the librarians and I were
perfect idiots but we were making the same keystrokes that he
was.  It would work for a day or so and then work strangely
again.

One day the Head of the Government Documents group grabbed me and
showed me the database was working improperly again.  I found my
manager.  "Please humor me this time," I requested.  "I know you
think I'm out of my mind, but just go along."  I asked him to
come and watch us use the database.  I wanted him to neither
speak nor touch the keyboard ... just watch.  My purpose, I
explained, was to keep the computer from knowing he was there. 
He agreed.

We tried the database again.  Its behavior was as difficult as we
had always experienced. My boss watched our attempts that had
worked for him but did not work for us.  Following the test, I
said, "this is what it keeps doing."  He replied, "Now that I've
seen what it is doing, I think I can fix it.  Let me try one more
thing."  He sat down and began a search in the database, using
the same search strategy we had used.  The database functioned
perfectly.  "I don't beleive this!" he said.  "This is what we've
been trying to tell you," I answered.  "It works for you but not
for us."

Thus far, I've not had anyone able to explain why the database,
in so short a time space, using the same search, did not work one
moment and worked the next.  However, I will tell people that
computers have a mission in life.  That mission is to make the
user look like an idiot in the worst possible way.  Using that
explanation, I've been able to calm many a deeply frustrated
person.  Although they aren't happy about their experience, they
feel better knowing that the computer people don't think they are
idiots, that its the machine and not them.

-- 

Debbie

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Debra Lords			Experience is what you
dlords at library.utah.edu		have just right after 
ACLIS Labs			you need it.
585-9810

"Gary E. Masters" wrote:
> 
> I talk to my computers a lot.  Prayer works best, but threats are also
> effective.
> 
> (smile)
> 
> Gary Masters
> 
> Deanna Collison wrote:
> 
> > I've had a lot of funny experiences with people who have no idea what a
> > computer is or how to operate it. One day soon after installing our new
> > OPAC PC's, I noticed a patron standing in front of it  looking at the
> > screen. When asked if she needed help, she replied "no". She stood there
> > for a few more minutes and my attention was drawn elsewhere. Pretty soon
> > I hear a low murmuring from behind the monitor. She was talking to it
> > like it was a computer from the show Star Trek! She thought she could
> > give it voice commands! I tried to keep a straight face when I went over
> > to help her, but it was hard!
> > Peace, Deanna Collison